The Luckiest Kid in the World by Danny Wallace

Author:Danny Wallace
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon & Schuster UK
Published: 2022-02-17T00:00:00+00:00

Mum and Dad didn’t argue in the end because Mum is really good at hiding her feelings and just being annoyed in silence. She likes to avoid conflict. The only way you’d ever know she was annoyed is from hearing her very long sighs and the way she slams her mug down on to the kitchen worktop or bangs cupboards shut. It’s very subtle.

Dad’s aubergine thing has made me think. I know I’ve got all my favourite things, but if I don’t try new stuff then I’ll just have the same favourite things my whole life. I’m not sure if that’s good or not. It seems important, but I’m not sure why. I must make sure that in among all the meaty pastas I make room for the odd aubergine. And, luckily, Dad’s aubergines are odd. Tasty but odd.

Anyway, Mum pops in before I go to sleep and says Mr Albert is really happy with all my work so far. She looks relieved. She doesn’t like to let people down. She says Mr Albert texted to say they’re already making some very big changes thanks to me, and I’m to keep it up because they’re moving fast. I could even be responsible for changing the face of not just Didcot, but everywhere!

‘That’s nice,’ I say, yawning. I love going to bed after swimming, all tired.

She says that tomorrow is a paperwork day, whatever that means, but before she goes I want to say something because I’ve been thinking about what happened at dinner.

‘I’m sorry you never did your camper van thing, Mum. I’m sorry people didn’t want to buy spaghetti out of a van.’

‘Well, that’s what people kept telling us,’ she says and sighs. ‘So it seemed silly to try. A waste of money.’

‘You should have just asked me,’ I say. ‘I’d buy spaghetti out of a van.’

‘Would you, Joe?’

‘Yes. And I’m the average kid.’

She gives me a kiss on the head.

‘I’m pleased you would’ve bought my spaghetti,’ she says. ‘But I don’t think you’re average.’

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